Our Body Whisperer ☥ The Art Of Nudging
I hit my tipping point with white people in middle school. I was frustrated almost to the point of being suicidal because I couldn't figure out how I was going to continue living with them if there would be no consequences for their actions, and my efforts would be continually suppressed. By the time I got to middle school, I realized that the torment of the white students would not stop, and some of my teachers were committing crimes right in front of me. Their behaviors reflected an unacceptable reality that I had to grapple with in order to move forward. I'm not sure when I became aware of my body whisperer, but I distinctly remember being guided by something inside myself in middle school. I now realize that the "something that kept nudging me" was my body whisperer. After the devastation of seeing the results of a knee-jerk reaction that caused harm, I became more self-aware. I started to notice how quickly I would react to something, and felt this inner hesitation that would pause me long enough to regain control of my emotions. I noticed that I was attracted to the words "anger" and "rage" from watching The Incredible Hulk, and realized that other people were causing Dr. Banner to turn into the Hulk and certain people/situations would calm the Hulk down. white people were causing me to feel the same kind of rage, but I didn't want to cause the type of damage that I saw the Hulk commit on the show. I became aware that I was receiving nudges through my intuition. My body whisperer sent me a thought, "What would calm down the Hulk inside of me?" My bonus Dad gave me a microscope in elementary school because I was constantly analyzing things. My body whisperer sent me a thought, "What if I looked at my actions the way I looked at things I put in a petri dish?" I started to observe human behavior pluralistically, but I didn't have the language to understand what I was actually doing until I took a psychology course in high school. The question that haunted me was, "How was I going to live in a world with white people without turning into the Hulk?"
The price for freedom may be high, but the price that we pay for being imprisoned and cut off from the very root of our being is even higher. When you choose life, you must have the courage to sacrifice your old, worn-out, ineffective self. ☥ ☥ Queen Afua ☥
Artist Galal Yousif managed to flee Sudan when conflict erupted earlier this year with only a few belongings stuffed into a small backpack. The turmoil and bag, in which he had crammed his passport, two pairs of jeans, five shirts and a car key, is depicted in his painting 'Man With a Heavy Heart.' ☥ He first created the work as a mural in Addis Ababa, the capital of Ethiopia, which he reached after a harrowing journey in June. ☥ Having now found temporary refuge in Kenya, he has recreated it on canvas - a striking image of a man with a hand over his heart, surrounded by large circular red dots resembling gunshot wounds. ☥ ☥ Ismail Einashe ☥ Letter From Africa Series, Nairobi ☥ From, 'Sudan War: Heavy Hearts For The Artists Painting The Pain Of Conflict'
My body whisperer nudged me again, "If white people make me angry, then what makes me calm down?" This time, the question hit me differently and changed the trajectory of my life. I kept going back to, "If white people make me ..." Why was that concept lingering in my mind? I struggled with it for a long time and kept watching "The Incredible Hulk" hoping that Dr. Banner's life would offer some clues. Then, my body whisperer nudged me in a slightly different way, "Why do I let white people make me angry?" This thought threw me down a rabbit hole. The question triggered rage. Let??!! Did I have a choice? The white kids did what they wanted to do. In fact, the one time I withdrew my hand from a white person to protect myself, I was sent to the principal's office (who confirmed that my need for respect/consent would not be honored at that school and warned me to watch my step).
My body whisperer would not let up and sent me a thought, "white kids don't bother me as much now because I have grown taller than them, right?" Hmmm, well that was true. My body whisperer sent me a thought, "Practice modeling at school." When I was in middle school, my parents had put me in modeling school. They noticed that I was feeling awkward because I was about eight inches taller than most of my classmates. My modeling school was in Philadelphia, where the gorgeous tall Black women straightened me out before the teacher could get to me. I took the advice of my body whisperer and started practicing walking like a model in school. I immediately noticed a change in the white kids. I began to pay attention to this mysterious thing that would arise from inside me as a quiet thought or question. Was it God? It must be ... The white kids shifted their strategy, and their torment went from physical to verbal/psychological. My body whisperer was relentless, "If I'm no longer intimidated by the Black kids who are pressuring me to only have friends who are 'Black enough' for them, why do I care about what white people say?" Before I could consider an answer, my body whisperer sent me a thought, "white kids are sneaky and they want me to get in trouble. Ignore them and figure out what calms me down." No matter how much I wanted to complain, the thought kept at me, "What calms me down?" I kept thinking about the microscope, and somehow the idea came to me that I have to look closely at things.
When I got to high school, I took a psychology course that helped me to refine my processes of scientific observation. I noticed that attempting to solve the problem was something that "calmed me down," so whenever white people would attack or annoy me, I would attempt to figure out why. I observed, took notes and constantly conducted interviews. I also grilled my high school psychology teacher and spent time in the library searching for answers. Whenever I would get angry, my body whisperer would ask, "Why am I angry?" followed by, "Why are they saying/acting like that?" My experiments kept me busy, calmed me down, and created enough emotional distance for me to greatly reduce knee-jerk reactions. I ended up befriending a white male who protected me from the white boys at school, but I rode the school bus with a white male who was very difficult to manage. He would not keep his hands off of me, and the word "no" meant nothing to him. My body whisperer sent me a thought, "If I hold his hands, at least I'll know/can control where they are." So, he became an experiment, and although I felt like it was an unwelcomed compromise, I used the opportunity to observe, ask questions and test different ways to assert my boundaries.
After I graduated from college, I discovered that spending a day binge watching science fiction entertained and calmed me down. Although the Syfy channel showed way too many horror and B films, I still found myself reverting to it when I wanted to zone out. By this time, my body whisperer was sending more complex thoughts/questions such as, "Do I need friends? What is the purpose of friends? Is this person a friend or an energy vampire? If I can choose who to hang out with in my spare time, who do I spend time with?" One day, I remembered how much fun I had with my family "down south" when we spent the entire day watching old Black movies.
I didn't realize that so many old Black movies existed. My body whisperer sent me a thought, "If white people are stressing me out, why not spend an entire day without white people?" So, I began what became a life long practice of spending at least 24 hours immersed in Black culture, especially when I was feeling stressed. I wouldn't watch the news, TV or go outside. It was almost like a date. I would light candles, get all of my favorite foods so that I wouldn't have to leave the house and just hang out with my culture. I remembered that some of the best times I've had included:
☥ Dancing to calypso music in the Caribbean and at house parties
☥ Dancing to salsa music with Cuban/Indigenous friends in Miami
☥ African film festivals, cultural events, watching African TV shows. I love Jemeji enough
to devote a full blog to it. For now, I will just say that, for me, colonization has felt like a
grenade has blown parts of who I am all over the world. As I put the pieces of my life
back together, Jemeji has functioned like a puzzle piece that is large enough to help me decode the full puzzle.
The pattern was clear, and I finally discovered what truly calmed me down. My soul wanted me to learn more about who I am.
This practice of immersion in culture was the seed that eventually grew into my idea for creating phyllishubbard.com as, "A Healing Space For Everyone That Centers Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant People."
The Art Of Healing Hidden Trauma: A Double Down Digression
Between films about culture and science fiction, I had found a way to convert my home into a temporary healing space where I could immerse myself in culture and explore the galaxy. One day, I was in my science fiction couch potato mode when an older movie came on that captured my attention. It wasn't a Black film, and the special effects were cheesy (typical of an 1980's film), but its themes caused me to watch it occasionally over the years. The name of the film is They Live. Here's an abbreviated synopsis from Wikipedia:
Nada, a homeless drifter comes to Los Angeles in search of a job. He finds employment at a construction site and is befriended by coworker Frank, who invites him to live in a shanty town soup kitchen ... a hacker takes over television broadcasts, claiming that scientists have discovered signals that are enslaving the population and keeping them in a dream-like state, and that the only way to stop it is to shut off the signal at its source. Those watching the broadcast complain of headaches. Nada ... discovers the hacker and a secret group meeting at a church. He notices a box ... and discovers that they contain sunglasses that make the world appear monochrome, but also reveal subliminal messages in the media to consume, reproduce, and conform. The glasses also reveal that many people who look and act human are actually aliens with skull-like faces. Once Nada forces Frank to put on the sunglasses, they join the anti-alien movement and learn that the aliens are using global warming to make Earth more like their own planet, and are depleting the Earth's resources for their own gain. They also learn that the aliens have been bribing humans to become collaborators, promoting them to positions of power ... Nada figures out where the source of the signal is and destroys the transmitter which liberates the human population. ☥ From The Plot Description Of 'They Live' ☥ Wikipedia ☥
I understood Osho to say that metaphors are important because they help people to raise their level of consciousness. He gave the example that if a person saw a beautiful flower on another planet, how would they describe it to someone from earth who had never seen anything like it? The person would have to use a series of metaphors to help the person visualize and conceptualize the flower. Osho's commentary reflects one of my biggest challenges as a healer. Healing my body took me to the equivalent of the other side of a mountain. It is so much better there, but how do I get people to go there when they think they are fine where they are? Why travel into the unknown when we can take drugs to distract us, numb our pain and suppress symptoms? Why travel when all that we could want is available to us right here? I'm going to double down on a few of the plot themes from the movie "They Live" to help us explore the multidimensional aspects of the art of healing hidden trauma.
Even Africa’s wealthiest man has trouble traveling in his own continent. Despite doing business in multiple countries, Nigerian-born Aliko Dangote complains he faces far more hurdles crossing Africa than visitors with European passports ever do. CNN Travel ☥ Larry Madowo ☥
... a hacker takes over television broadcasts, claiming that scientists have discovered signals that are enslaving the population and keeping them in a dream-like state, and that the only way to stop it is to shut off the signal at its source. ☥ From The Plot Description Of 'They Live' ☥ Wikipedia ☥
"They Live" Plot Theme: Default Thinking/Behaviors
The first concept that jumped out at me from "They Live" was the idea of a sneaky alien colonizer who invades and conquers while allowing the conquered to believe that nothing has happened. People are allowed to live their lives, earn money, have families, etc. The aliens use deception via a transmitted signal that puts the humans into a "dream-like" state and prevents them from seeing the truth. The fact that people believe that they are progressing makes them less likely to seek the truth, even if they discover the manipulation ("ignorance is bliss" and "don't rock the boat" are spammed cultural idioms that can be traced back to english, roman and american colonizers). The movie also includes the story of humans who find out about the invasion, but choose to spy on/turn against their own people and collaborate with the invaders who, in return, offer them financial incentives and positions of power within society that promote the aliens' agenda.
The investment in psychological sleep is tremendous ... [Wars] can be prevented only if we awaken enough people so those people become infectious and go on awakening other people ... Otherwise the [people who are psychologically asleep] are going to destroy this earth ... Ego exists as a substitute self in [psychological] sleep. The moment you are awakened, ego has no function ... You are there, now you don't need it. And the [person] who knows [themself] has no inferiority complex. The inferiority complex is the cause of everybody becoming ambitious, because if they don't become somebody in the world, then in their own eyes, they have failed ... ☥ ☥ Osho ☥
The social program of comfort and luxury is used as a weapon of control to the point that many people begin to believe that the only way to obtain comfort and luxury is through pillaging, manipulation, sacrificing integrity, etc. We are spammed with propaganda that attempts to convince us that comfort is a result of what we acquire instead of the result of inner peace. We think that our problems will go away once we have acquired wealth, but if we obtain wealth without healing past traumas, we leave ourselves vulnerable to self-sabotage. We may make decisions based on a need to prove ourselves or hide from pain which can cause us to lose our wealth, health and more. How do we cultivate a healthy, balanced mind that evolves in consciousness as we acquire wealth? Our engagement with the distractions of competition, jealousy, envy, etc. causes us to forget that we can have inner peace ☥ comfort ☥ luxury if we heal past traumas and our lives are guided by our innate intelligence. Self-awareness ☥ empowerment attracts wealth and promotes win/win situations that generates a ripple effect of wealth around it. Inferiority complexes create hoarding that blocks the flow of wealth in order to create a delusion of superiority.
Artist Steve Bandoma is appealing to his government in the Democratic Republic of Congo to give more support to arts and culture. ☥ Mr. Bandoma has just had his first solo exhibition in London, but he was refused a visa to travel for the event, which had to go ahead without him. ☥ From 'Steve Bandoma's Struggle For Congolese Art' BBC News
Listed below are a few basic examples of social signals that can keep us in a dream-like state. Notice how the social signals provide a way for us to bypass personal and social accountability/popularize habits that cause us to run on default in our thoughts, conversations and actions:
☥ There's more than one way to skin a cat. Do we skin cats in our society? Then why do
we use this outdated cultural idiom? We can instead choose to use empowered
language that affirms our commitment to solving challenges pluralistically.
☥ He's not Black enough for her. What is the definition of "Black enough?" Why are we
commenting on whether as person is Black enough for another person? It's their
relationship, so why not let them work it out? This perception can also cause him to feel
like he doesn't have a shot with her, and for her to feel pressured to not like him, when in
fact they could be a great match for each other. They will never know if they do not
☥ She made me do it. She may have coerced, threatened or manipulated us, but we chose
to do it.
☥ Not before my coffee! When we cannot take action without a stimulant and cannot relax
without a sedative, then we are emotionally addicted to the social program of
celebrating dependence on an outside substance, and we are physically addicted to the
substance itself.
☥ You're too much woman for me. This statement is a passive/aggressive way of
fishing to see if the woman is interested, and is driven by a lack of confidence.
☥ They say that ... Who are they? What do they have to do with your life? Perhaps
something they say can provide a useful perspective, but as long as we are listening to
what they say, we are not tapping into and listening to our innate intelligence.
In "They Live," the resistance movement has found a way to transcend the manipulative signal in order to wake up the people by using sunglasses to "see" which is significant, because the aliens use light to blind people and put them in a dream-like state. However, in order to wake up the people, they must put on the sunglasses. I think I was attracted to this film because I find myself feeling like the "Nada" character, reluctantly fighting with people to encourage them to do the equivalent of "putting on the sunglasses."
Innately, we are healers. Innately we have all the medicine in us already. So, if we were just to play a rhythm, whether that be the first heartbeat - the drum that we heard from our mother, her heart, and if we just played that drumbeat and we allowed ourselves to work into rhythm with that, then we would start to hear our medicine. So, it goes from simply moving our bodies in rhythm to then how that can happen in our music, in our songs, but so much more ... When we did the Rafiki 10th Annual Black Health and Healing Summit - what I wanted everywhere was ... [for you to] see art, to see beauty, to see something that stamped in your unconscious access to spirit, access to culture, access to healing for yourself. It doesn’t have to be someone else giving you this medicine. It’s already within us. We just have … to tap into it. And, we also have to block out all of the barriers around it … that interfere [with] us accessing our medicine. One of the things that art - especially theatre - does for us is - we begin to, when we step into that as a modality, let go of other things and step into pure emotion, into pure spirit, into channeling and that allows us to move forward and let go … ☥ ☥ ☥ Dr. Monique LeSarre ☥
"They Live" Plot Theme: Numbing Devices/Distractions
This part of the plot is significant because the headache represents the colonizers' attempt to stop the hacker's message from reaching the people. The headache is a distraction and serves as punitive action against those who could potentially set themselves free.
Here are a few examples of numbing devices/distractions that colonizers use through the social programming that influences our behaviors. Notice how many of these examples appear to originate as thoughts coming from inside of ourselves.
☥ I have a headache, I need an aspirin. Why are we automatically reaching for an aspirin
without investigating why we have a headache? We continually repeat this behavior, as
if we are in a trance, without considering that after the aspirin wears off, our headache
returns, which could have been caused by factors that have nothing to do with taking
an aspirin such as hunger, dehydration, toxins in the colon, improper breathing, lack of
movement, etc.
☥ I had a rough day; I need a drink! The drink is a distraction that keeps us from focusing
on solving the problem. After consuming the drink, we have weakened our liver with
alcohol and neglected to solve the challenges that arose from our "rough day."
☥ I’m sorry you didn’t make the team, here, have some ice cream. This is yet another
example of distraction that also fuels emotional and physical addictions. After the ice
cream, we are now full of calories that we need to work off, on a downer from the sugar
rush and have no strategy for improving ourselves so that we can make the team the
next time the opportunity presents itself. This mode of default thinking is especially
harmful when we teach it to our children because they quickly learn to pacify
themselves with an addictive substance, such as sugar, which could set them up for
addictions/addictive behaviors later in life.
The art of health and healing in my being and spirit is really about … how African American People have survived and we’ve survived through our art. We’ve healed through our art, and I think that sometimes we forget that [art] is how we heal - through our creativity, through the incredible songs we sing, the movements that we brought from Africa that we’ve innovated here [in America] to different dances. The oratory gifts we have, and I think of James Baldwin and Maya Angelou when I say that - Paul Robeson … there are creative gifts that have followed us since we’ve come here [to America] that’s how we’ve survived this journey. ☥ ☥ Ty Blair ☥
... sunglasses ... that ... reveal subliminal messages in the media to consume, reproduce, and conform. The glasses also reveal that many people who look and act human are actually aliens with skull-like faces. ☥ From The Plot Description Of 'They Live' ☥ Wikipedia ☥
Currently, there is still speculation about this effect [of subliminal stimuli]. Many authors have continued to argue for the effectiveness of subliminal cues in changing consumption behavior, citing environmental cues as a main culprit of behavior change.[47] Authors who support this line of reasoning cite findings such as Ronald Millman's research that showed slow-paced music in a supermarket was associated with more sales and customers moving at a slower pace.[48] Findings such as these support the notion that external cues can affect behavior, although the stimulus may not fit into a strict definition of subliminal stimuli because although the music may not be attended to or consciously affecting the customers, they are certainly able to perceive it. ☥ ☥ Wikipedia ☥
"They Live" Plot Theme: Propaganda/Psychological Manipulation
Here are a few examples of marketing strategies that use propaganda to promote convenience as the main selling feature instead of addressing and removing the root cause of the problem.
☥ Periods are so 'yesterday.' Who has time for periods? These types of ads promote the
idea that having a period is old fashioned and that the new wave of the future is to
conquer nature and skip having a period. Periods are seen as an inconvenience and a
time waster. Most importantly, the ads are usually selling some type of birth control pill
that has a side effect of/can be manipulated to stop periods for months or even years.
These marketing strategies erupted during a time when many nonprofits were
attempting to reduce the stigma of having a period. Because the stigmas still exist,
they help to promote these products. As a Root Cause Analyst, I conduct investigations
until I locate the origin of a problem in order to remove it. Where are the ads that teach
people how to balance hormones naturally, such as through nutrition and emotional
mastery? Where are the ads that help us understand the natural processes of our body
so that we embrace who we are instead of suppress elements of ourselves? Instead of
focusing on stopping troublesome periods (caused by imbalances such as
endometriosis), why won't we teach people how to heal the dis-ease that fuels the
problem? These ads created solutions that are tantamount to cutting grass to get rid of
weeds, which is good for business because it ensures that the weeds will continually
grow back.
☥ Get rid of your back pain + depression! In The Pain Remedy Hidden In Plain Sight, I share
the story of one of my clients who was trapped in a cycle with an antidepressant. He felt
sick while on the drug, but had suicidal tendencies when he attempted to get off of the
drug. I found a healing strategy for him that allowed him to work with his doctor to
safely transition off of the drug, while I taught him how to make himself strong enough
to no longer need the drug. A few years later, I was especially disturbed to see ads
running for this drug promoting it as a feel-good muscle relaxant. The side effects were
carefully framed in a deceptive fashion that downplayed the dependency issue. My
client struggled to liberate himself from the drug for 10 years before making an
appointment with me, and I saw first hand how the drug affected his life. The goal is
maximum profits because once the first sale is made and the person starts taking the
drug, they will give up and default to continuing to pay for and take the drug even
though they are miserable.
Many, many other examples exist in just about every aspect of our culture including predatory lending practices that increase debt and cause people to lose property, marketing white women as the standard for beauty and selling skin lightening creams, etc.
One of the primary presenters that we had was Dr. Joy DeGruy, talking beyond ‘Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome’ and beyond those pieces that divide us - into solutions - into building the village - into moving forward because we’ve been able to host her several times now around the ‘Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome’ and we wanted to move into the next piece. One of the things that happened with the way that medicine operates is that it splits us up as people. So, here’s the Psychologist over here, here’s the Allopathic doctor over here, here’s your Nutritionist over here, here’s your gym over here … All of these pieces are so separate that what we are really visioning is that our health is all connected. It’s connected to our spirit. It’s connected to our psyche. It’s connected to what we eat. It’s connected to how we move. It’s connected to how we love. It’s connected to how we feel about ourselves. And so bringing in the psychology piece and really claiming that psychology is really about our health. So, we know through Adverse Childhood Experiences, or ACEs, which ... normed a huge study on thousands of typical middle class white folks that the amount of exposure to trauma led to early death … That’s not even including systemic racism. That’s not even including what happens, the shootings, the domestic violence, the addiction, the incarceration, the heavy policing in our community, so that is not even included in that study - in that ACE experiment. So, now we’re looking at Black folks who have toxic stress, and in that toxic stress, we can’t relax. We can’t heal ourselves. So, what I’m trying to focus on is how it all comes together. The body is just the symptom. The problems. The dis-ease. The way that we are not at ease, dis-ease, how that comes together is a symptom of all of the things that have happened to us. And we are NOT [what] has happened to us. We are so much more. And so that is what [our Black Health and Healing Summit] has been about. ☥ ☥ Dr. Monique LeSarre ☥
... the aliens are using global warming to make Earth more like their own planet, and are depleting the Earth's resources for their own gain. ☥ From The Plot Description Of 'They Live' ☥ Wikipedia ☥
"They Live" Plot Theme: Exploitation + Colonialism
The greed of colonizers gave birth and continue to augment our current climate change challenges through subjugation, exploitation and violence. A few examples include:
☥ The deaths of hundreds of millions of Black ☥ Indigenous People through murder and
infectious diseases
☥ The deforestation and desertification of land
☥ Burning of fossil fuels
☥ Pollution and irresponsible waste management
Exploitation colonialism involves fewer colonists and focuses on the exploitation of natural resources or labour to the benefit of the metropole. This form consists of trading posts as well as larger colonies where colonists would constitute much of the political and economic administration. The European colonization of Africa and Asia was largely conducted under the auspices of exploitation colonialism.[19]. ☥ ☥ Wikipedia ☥
It just shows you what the possibilities are. If we think of things differently, we really can change the way we build and the way we design our buildings ... As architects we tend to stay focused on people, but we share this planet. When we start to think about accommodating other species, it's also a very powerful narrative. (Oshinowo) ☥ ☥ ... the exhibits from Africa, a continent disproportionately affected by the climate crisis, showed how designers were starting to work in 'better balance with ecology.' (Ndukwe) ☥ ☥ ☥ Tosin Oshinowo ☥ Nigerian Architect ☥ From, 'What African Architecture Can Teach The World' By ☥ Ijeoma Ndukwe ☥
They also learn that the aliens have been bribing humans to become collaborators, promoting them to positions of power ... ☥ From The Plot Description Of 'They Live' ☥ Wikipedia ☥
I experienced a deep, deep betrayal from a white male whom I thought was a friend. I had to sit with the betrayal for a long time. We were friends for a number of years which gave him plenty of time to gather intel and ease his way into my inner circle of relationships. On the day of the betrayal, he stood by my side, knowing that he was responsible for the pain I was experiencing. I experienced another betrayal from a Black woman whom I was helping to establish her work with a group of professionals. In both cases, the mighty sucker punches knocked the wind out of me. However, as I healed, the wind returned to me as Shu ☥ God Of Air ☥ Sustenance Of Life. I invested a lot of time in my Kamitic Yoga practice and, after five years of practice, I developed the stamina ☥ discipline to practice for four hours each day when I managed my time properly. By the time I began the process of awakening, my mind ☥ vision was clear, and I could recognize insights, wisdom and empowering suggestions that were coming to me from my innate intelligence.
Towards the end of "They Live," Nada was stunned by a deep betrayal that ended up costing him his life. The woman who betrayed him also killed Frank and was in Nada's inner circle of relationships and under the influence of the aliens' psychological manipulation → warfare/terrorism which used fear, scarcity, financial incentives and competition to turn humans against each other. I remember hearing Osho say that understanding is the only discipline. I understood his words intellectually, but now I believe I can deeply feel the lessons in his message which helped me to unpack, heal and release the deep betrayals of my past. Listed below are some of the universal lessons that helped me to heal ☥ take inspired actions → self-awareness ☥ protection (notice how some lessons overlap/are connected to other lessons).
☥ Lesson #0 - My ancestors lost their land, people, history, culture, art, language and
so much more because of deep, deep betrayals. I need to understand my history ☥
culture, but I also need to understand the anatomy and physiology of the colonizer
mindset so that I can develop effective counterstrategies to thwart their actions. My
ancestors heal as I heal. Decolonization begins in my mind and through my actions. It is
OK for me to feel angry from time to time, as long as I process that anger and transform
it into wisdom + inspired actions.
☥ Lesson #1 - Every red flag is legitimate and must be investigated, no matter how
small or insignificant it may seem on the surface.
☥ Lesson #2 - Do not underestimate the power of jealousy to drive behaviors. Jealousy (envy, etc.) shows up in many forms and often hides behind seemingly friendly
behaviors. When I notice it in people around me, I need to address it immediately. Suggestions include empowering reframes that help people around me to recognize
the unique value they bring to a situation, refraining from making comparisons and
never suppressing my power/potential to make other people feel comfortable.
☥ Lesson #3 - It is not possible to negotiate with a narcissist. They must be identified
and removed from my inner circle, and they must clearly remain behind strong healthy
boundaries that I define, set and enforce. If I relax my boundaries, I will experience
another betrayal.
☥ Lesson #4 - No one will think or behave the way I want/expect them to think/behave.
People can only be who they are, and if they don't know how to heal, they will engage in
sabotage of self/others, almost by default. This doesn't excuse their behavior, but it
needs to inform how I respond to their behavior.
☥ Lesson #5 - I must heal my emotions in order to transcend the pain of the betrayals
so that I can understand the lesson ☥ self-correct, because if I miss the lessons
(which includes behaviors that I need to change), they will repeat in another form.
☥ Lesson #6 - Most people have not been taught how to process and heal emotions, so
they have become masters of distraction, deflection and suppression. These
behaviors are celebrated and reinforced through social programming/herd mentality. It
is vitally important that I do not judge or take the behavior of others personally. At the
same time, it is imperative that I cultivate benchmarks for trust and enforce healthy
boundaries to prevent them from engaging in substandard behaviors.
☥ Lesson #7 - Because I am still waking up, I don't know how deeply I've been affected
by social programming. I need to protect myself by making an unwavering habit out
of questioning my thoughts/perceptions and improving my behavior based on my
new growth/what I'm learning.
Burkino Faso-born architect, Diébédo Francis Kéré, has become the first African to win the prestigious Pritzker Prize, which is often referred to as the Nobel Prize of architecture. His highly esteemed work, including permanent and temporary structures, has been erected in his country of birth, but also across Africa, Europe and the United States. (BBC Afrique) ☥ 'I grew up in a community where there was no kindergarten, but where community was your family. I remember the room where my grandmother would sit and tell stories with a little light, while we would huddle close to each other and her voice inside the room enclosed us, summoning us to come closer and form a safe place. This was my first sense of architecture ... Architecture is an instrument we can use to create better cities, to create space to inspire people, to create classrooms which inspire the best generation.' ☥ ☥ ☥ Diébédo Francis Kéré ☥ From, 'Diébédo Francis Kéré: The First African To Win Architecture's Top Award' ☥ BBC Afrique ☥
☥ Lesson #8 - Colonizers use economic suppression, social programming and herd
mentality to shock Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant People into silence or acquiesce. I
must have a daily practice that keeps me calm, grounded, centered and alert so that
when the shock appears, I can respond instead of knee-jerk react. Here are a few
basic examples of times when I was shocked into inaction/a knee-jerk reaction:
☥ I had made it to the last round of interviews for a remote job that I really wanted with
an organization that provided mental health services. I had a Zoom interview with an
executive who was a white male. He had left his job as a surgeon to help run the
organization. When the white male started the Zoom call, he was in bed and wearing
no shirt. It was obvious that he had just woken up, and he made no apology for his
appearance. How much money would I have needed to make a formal complaint that
caused him to be accountable for his actions?
☥ I was looking through some paint samples at a local hardware store when I felt like
someone was watching me. I looked up and saw a white woman staring. I ignored her,
but then she took a step in my direction. I gave her the, "Don't even think about
taking another step in my direction look," when she said, "I want to tell you something,
but if I tell you, it could endanger your life." I responded, "Then don't tell me." I walked
away, but I would have preferred to have followed through/reported her to security.
☥ I was standing in the First Class line getting ready to board, when a white woman
pushed her way past me while saying out loud to no one in particular, "Is this the First
Class line?" She used her rushing as an excuse to go to the beginning of the line. It
happened so fast, I just let her go. But, when I got on the plane, I had a window seat
and guess who was sitting in the aisle seat? She jumps when she sees me and says,
"Oh! Are you sitting here?" I said, "Yes" and waited while she got up so that I could
take my seat. She attempted to be friendly, but I was too annoyed to deal with her. I
would have preferred that I addressed her behavior instead of festering.
The dehumanization of Blackness and its effects on Black females are rooted in the harsh history of slavery in America. Attributes such as race and gender impact their life and educational experiences. Examining the historical implications of dehumanization through the lens of Critical Race and Black Radical Feminist Theories provides a foundation for understanding issues surrounding gender, race, and identities of black females in society. ☥ From 'Spaces for Difference: An Interdisciplinary Journal,' Volume 1, number 1, pp. 65-85
When we do the equivalent of "putting on the sunglasses" so that we can "see" the covert strategies of colonization, we can see how Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant People are gradually socialized to dehumanize each other. I was at an event that included a book signing. I was standing in line to have my book signed by a Black male celebrity that I would put into the "well-known, sex symbol" category within Black communities. He was signing books, taking pictures and conversing with people. However, just before I approached him, he turned his head to talk to a few other Black males who were standing by. He continued talking to them while ignoring me. I was quite surprised by his behavior and was considering walking away, when he suddenly reached over, grabbed my book, found the chapter he had written, signed his name and returned the book to me all while his head was turned and he was laughing and talking to the other Black males. The moment shocked me into inaction. As I walked away, I regreted not calling out his behavior. I didn't want his signature in my book, and I sat with the way his behaviors dehumanized me for quite some time. The only difference between me and the other people in line was that I was quite a bit taller. Though this Black male was taller than me, I got the impression that he somehow felt intimidated by my stature and used the moment to assert his power in the only way he knew how (lack of confidence that he was attempting to hide through overcompensation). This is very typical of Knight behavior. I later learned that he happily took a picture with the person who was standing right behind me, so there was something about me that was triggering for this man.
Other ways that colonization gradually socializes us to dehumanize each other include:
☥ Funding work that dumbs down our culture
☥ Funding music that dengrates women (i.e. Hip Hop music branding Black women as
"bitches and ho's")
☥ Funding TV shows, movies, etc. that trend barbaric behaviors and present them as
either socially acceptable or as behaviors that give people "status"
Do we see the common demoninators?
We represent a $1.8 trillion dollar market that is growing steadily, but our unresolved trauma and unwillingess/lack of knowledge to heal causes us to reinvest in the perpetuation of these behaviors to go along with the herd instead of taking back control of our mind and emotions so that we can invest in the fulfillment of our potential. When we don't know how to heal, we play "hot potato" with our pain and suffering which is a coping mechanism that sustains cycles of pain within our communities.
☥ Lesson #10 - When in doubt, ask, "What would love do?" Not the socialized,
commercialized or superficial versions of love that are promoted in the media, but love
as the source of all there is.
☥ Lesson #11 - Nothing I do will stop white people from trying to sabotage what I do →
my actions must include counterstrategies for potential sabotage. I don’t remember
when I first learned this lesson, but the moment that comes to mind is the sensation that I felt when my hair stylist first permed my hair. There was something about
the way my scalp stung from the chemicals that let me know that I was making a
mistake that I would deeply regret, but I didn’t have the knowledge or strength of
character to make a better decision for myself. I later realized that perming my hair to
stop white people from tormenting me was sort of like giving heroin to a heroin addict
to make them go away. Perming my hair did nothing to protect me from white people.
In fact, there was a girl in my school who didn’t perm her hair, and I was not treated any better than her. I admired her, and wished that I could have been as strong as her. The
sunk cost factor made it very difficult for me to overcome my mistake because I
couldn’t get past the emotions of grieving what I had lost of myself. However, once I
accepted the sunk cost, I was able to grieve properly and heal which was a necessary
step in helping me to get unstuck so that I could move forward. First, I calculated that perming my hair cost me over $30,000 + about 10 pounds of lost hair/burned scalp + the realization that my actions did not improve the behavior of white people + it
cultivated a sense of self-hatred within me → herd mentality of self-hatred among the Black People in my community. Then, I took the time to heal, forgive myself + the
people in my community who were too traumatized to mentor/help me heal. The final
step is ongoing. It involves tapping into my inner wisdom and thinking carefully about
what I am about to say or do. It also involves recognizing that jealousy and racism will cause white people + the Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant People who enforce
eurocentric agendas (consciously or subconsciously) to sabotage any action I choose to
take. This recognition keeps me from taking action without implementing
counterstrategies and anticipating potential sabotage. It acts as a check and balance
strategy because when I clarify my benchmarks for trust and insist that the people
around me meet those benchmaks, their actions will reveal whether or not they can be
trusted, and I can then adjust my actions accordingly.
☥ Lesson #12 - When people say things to us, investigate the truth before responding
emotionally to what we hear.
In the clip above, notice how the young woman makes assumptions about the truth
and then accuses the village priestess without engaging in a conversation to get at the
truth. This is happening because she is driven by emotions that are causing her to draw
conclusions based on circumstances that she doesn’t fully understand (partially
because she doesn’t understand her own culture). But, because she spent most of her life being educated in America, she believes that her (colonized) perception of the truth
is the only way to view the situation. She represents Africans of the diaspora/continent
who have been socially programmed to view traditions and culture as primitive,
uneducated and uncivilized and these perceptions persist even though colonizers’
actions towards us continue to be primitive, uneducated and uncivilized. Jemeji does a
spectacular job of helping us to see the fallacies in our behaviors as a person from the
city or village — and both groups of people have fallacies to correct.
Another way this plays out is when people say something to us in order to cause an
emotional reaction in us and then our reaction temporarily satisfies the person’s
emotional addiction to feeling like they had the power to make us do something. A way
out of these situations is to practice meditation. Check out my Journey to Radiance ☥
Sankofa blog to learn about S.N. Goenka and his meditation mentorship around
cultivating the ability to perceive sensations without reacting to them. This is not a
lesson that we can learn by reading this blog. As I mention in Journey to Radiance ☥
Sankofa, there are no shortcuts - we must practice in order to cultivate the skill. And if
this skill were a guitar, we would have to practice to be as good as B.B. King.
☥ Lesson #13 - The evolution of the sacrifice. I have a theory that I cannot yet prove, but I’m going to share it and would like for us to contemplate it over time. I believe that
when God asked us to make a sacrifice, we misinterpreted the meaning because we
were too afraid to do what was truly asked of us. So, instead of sacrificing what God
truly asked of us, we thought that we could fool God by sacrificing humans. This
practice went on for a very long time. Then came human rights initiatives, and we began
the practice of sacrificing animals and then eating them. But these are not the
sacrifices that God asked of us. We didn’t listen to God because what God asked us to
sacrifice was too scary for us to do because it requires that we face ourselves. So, what
is the evolution of the sacrifice? Think about the most bloody, gruesome sacrifice and
imagine what it would be like for self-hatred to be that incredulous sacrifice. How can
we kill self-hatred? How can we destroy self-hatred in such a way that it can no longer
drive our thoughts and actions? When we look at the statues in Kamit (Ancient Egypt),
we realize that our ancestors worked very hard to show us that we were greater than we
could possibly imagine. Why else would the statues be so incredibly large? So, how does
sacrificing a human or an animal improve our behavior? It doesn’t which is why I believe
that God did not ask us to sacrifice a human or an animal. God asks us to sacrifice self-
hatred. It is much more difficult than we think which is why we keep focusing on
something else, but the time for evolution is now. If we spend the next year sacrificing
self-hatred - if we kill it in the most final way possible, how will our lives change?
Sexual health that promotes self-care through the celebration of identity and culture is vital because rape has been an integral part of colonization, and most of the issues in Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant communities have some connection to hidden sexual trauma. Colonization creates a toxic environment that stigmatizes sexual health and prevents us from healing. ‘Sexual Health for Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant People’ uses visual healing art to demonstrate healthy behaviors, normalize sexual health education and increase active engagement of Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant People in self-care through representation that helps them relate to the content. We must acknowledge and heal generational trauma caused by racism, oppression and colonization. eurocentric images dominate the marketplace, promote eurocentrism as the criterion and prevent Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant People from seeing themselves as whole, beautiful, empowered individuals who command respect and are comfortable in our skin. If we ignore our sexual health, we will be unable to prevent the perpetuation of sexual ignorance, debility, perversion and abuse. ☥ ☥ Dr. Phyllis SHU Hubbard ☥
Nada figures out where the source of the signal is and destroys the transmitter which liberates the human population. ☥ From The Plot Description Of 'They Live' ☥ Wikipedia ☥
"They Live" Plot Theme: Identify + Remove The Root Cause Of The Problem = Liberation
Every challenge that we face in our community has repeated and will continue to repeat itself until we focus our efforts on identifying and removing the root causes. Root Cause Analysis is a discovery process that reveals solutions that were in our blind spots. Root Cause Analysis is a solutions based approach to problem solving that uses a wide array of tools and strategies to help us identify and remove the origin of a problem. The origin of a problem is like engine fuel. Without fuel, the engine cannot run. The root cause of a problem is the reason for its existence. Once the root cause is removed, the problem no longer exists. Root Cause Analysis teaches us how to strengthen the bond and communication between our body ☥ mind, improve our ability to solve novel problems in the future and cultivate courage, confidence and trust in ourselves.
Why Black Health and Healing is because, in our world and in this country, Blackness is still a reality where there is still a great deal of prejudice - where there is a great deal of bias on all accounts and in the health and healing arena. We have certainly found, I think you can see this all over the country, that we are the ones who are suffering from maladies that a lot of the rest of the population simply is not. And this is across economic lines. We’ve seen Black men [who] are getting prostate cancer, no matter what their economic situation is. Black women are now getting breast cancer at a rapid rate no matter what their economic situation is. And that says to me that there is something very distinct about being Black and what happens to Black People in this particular country. So, we are addressing that reality of what is happening to Black People … what has been happening to us and now with, as Dr. LeSarre was speaking of, with the sugary foods or the stress or … the peril that we live in what is being created are heath manifestations. So, we were drawn to helping those of us with … a reality of being Black, an identity of being Black, to triumph over these health situations that are manifesting in us … there are many levels, they’re physical, they’re emotional, they’re psychological - they’re in many different areas, but I think it’s all around carrying this identity of Blackness and what happens to us in carrying this identity in this country. ☥ ☥ Ty Blair ☥
Our Journey To Radiance ☥ The Art Of Health ☥ Healing podcast features Dr. Monique LeSarre (former Executive Director) and Ty Blair (former Program Manager), of the Rafiki Coalition.
Dr. Monique LeSarre holds a Doctorate in Clinical Psychology, a Masters in Clinical Psychology and a Bachelors in Interdisciplinary studies from the California Institute of Integral Studies (CIIS), where she also taught for over 8 years. She has over 23 years of experience as a Mental Health And Wellness Professional, working with diverse clients and settings to provide organizational consulting, individual and group trainings, and program assessment. She is the owner at Mixed Medicine LLC, a holistic health and wellness organization that offers integrative and innovative solutions for individuals, families and organizations. Additionally she has just stepped back from over 10 years as a Senior Executive in the non-profit space to to rekindle her passion for teaching, training, writing and sitting with clients. Dr. LeSarre, attributes her fierce critical thinking and social justice stance as being formed by her life experiences and honed by her undergraduate education in the Bachelors of Arts Completion Program at CIIS. Dr. LeSarre's teaching is fueled by Cornell West's quote, "Never forget that justice is what love looks like in public." Monique believes that in order to create individual and community healing, it is most effective to work on multiple levels of the system, beginning with individuals, families, and groups, and on academic, training, research, advocacy and policy levels. In her coaching and consulting work, she brings all of her vast experience in diverse spaces: clinical psychology training, her volunteer work with the KidCat Curriculum, working with Incarcerated men and Trans-women incarcerated as teens for life sentences, Insight Prison Project's Restorative Justice projects in San Quentin and SF Probation Adult Re-entry programs, her clinical work with adults, children and families in Oakland and San Francisco, her higher education teaching, the training experiences she has given in diverse settings across the state and her research and advocacy work in multiple health and mental health equity areas. ☥ LinkedIn ☥
Check out our Journey page to download and share the combined chapters as a MP3 file.
Tyger (Ty) Blair currently serves as a consultant for Bay Area nonprofit organizations that serve Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant communities.
☥ Remember to honor the voices of our children ☥ Art Expresses Our Healing ☥
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Epilogue ☥ Your Treasure Map For Self-Care
Thank you for taking the time to actively engage in your own self-care. If you have ever spent time at a hammam ☥ steam room ☥ sauna, you will notice that it is a comfortable space because you are wearing minimal or no clothing and you can just be yourself. However, after a short time, it starts to get hot, and you begin to sweat.
This is a good thing because you are helping your body to eliminate toxins. If you want to detoxify your body correctly you will:
☥ Breathe slowly and deeply to help your body adjust to the intensity of the heat.
☥ Sip water every 15 minutes to stay hydrated.
☥ Have a piece of fruit ☥ pumpkin seeds ☥ favorite healthy snack available.
☥ Take a shower after excessive sweating.
☥ Go into a cold room/take a cold plunge/cold water rinse off to cool down before doing
another sweat and to stimulate your lymphatic system.
☥ Go for a walk in nature, spend time in meditation ☥ contemplation, have a healthy meal
and give your body some time to complete the healing process (which could include
sending you messages through your intuition about your next steps).
As you journey through ☥ interact with the blogs ☥ other content on phyllishubbard.com, you might have an insight that causes you to suddenly feel mentally ☥ emotionally “hot” -- which could show up as:
☥ “Ah-ha” moments
☥ A hop-in-the-bed-and-cry-yourself-to-sleep or fetal position crying time of intensive
self-care
☥ Intense feelings of anger/regret about something in your past
☥ Disorientation caused by the realization of truth
☥ Strong reactions such as heightened senses, vomiting; an urge to release emotions
such as yelling/screaming, going outside for fresh air/to take a walk, punching a
boxing bag/pillow; a feeling of tightness in the chest, etc.
If you find yourself having a strong reaction, I encourage you to flow with it while helping your body to release mental ☥ emotional toxins by using the same five self-care strategies listed above for releasing physical toxins. Your body talks to you all the time, but unconscious adherence to social conditioning can mute its messages.
Strong reactions are your body’s way of letting you know that there is a deeper issue requiring your attention.
Keep revisiting the content ☥ utilizing the five self-care strategies until you no longer experience the strong reaction, release fears and have identified ☥ transformed ☥ removed the root cause of the issue. You will find additional strategies throughout this website that you can add to your mental health self-care toolkit.
Self-Care Sustainability Suggestions
☥ A Cross-Cultural Healing Haven – read this blog to understand the purpose of
phyllishubbard.com and the meaning behind its organization ☥ symbols.
☥ Revisit the content periodically and make a note of if/how your perceptions have
evolved. Check out our blog page for an experiential healing journey.
☥ Check out the other pages on phyllishubbard.com:
☥ Home - watch the videos. Click on the images in the Spiritual Guidance
section. Each image has a story that might assist your self-care journey. Learn
about other spiritual practices.
☥ About - Learn about my background ☥ reasons for co-creating
phyllishubbard.com with Spirit. Explore healing through the image carousel and
videos.
☥ Shop ☥ Kamitology - Purchase and download vital tools for your personal growth
☥ development.
☥ Reclaiming Our Humanity - Help us develop and disseminate video courses.
☥ Rise TV - Practice breathing and movement exercises and deepen your
understanding of healing through the experiences of community members.
Check back periodically to discover new/re-experience the content.
☥ Journey - This is your invitation to own the journey to radiance. Experience the
journey and download healing resources to share with your friends, family and
community.
When you share healing, healing comes back to and flows through you.
About Sharing ...
During my first presentation to an all-Black audience, I introduced 20-year-old research on the hazards of sitting. I presented the research because I noticed that people sat for way too long at convenings and realized that the information was not disseminated to Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant communities. I was determined to intentionally include this research, often surprising participants by getting people up to stretch. After more than 13 years of intentional work, Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant People are just barely beginning to normalize conscious movement. We still have a long way to go, and it is important that we share what we know as much as we can to prevent the disenfranchisement of wellness information to Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant communities.
Copy/Paste Version Of Full Citation Example:
Hubbard, P. S. (2020, September 27). The Art Of Health ☥ Healing. PHYLLISHUBBARD.COM.<https://www.phyllishubbard.com/post/the-art-of-health-healing>
Please do not keep phyllishubbard.com to yourself. We will not co-create a better world until we heal our current, past/childhood traumas. We will not love others until we learn to love ourselves.
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